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Instructions: Think about the selected aspects of your spouse’s personality. Circle five items that you think are characteristic of your spouse at times. For each item you circle, briefly think of an actual incident that really happened that illustrates this characteristic of your partner. The Gottman Relationship Checkup is a breakthrough in couple’s therapy as it allows for a confiden-tial, efficient way for your clinician to complete the evaluation process. By using this new technology, your assessment can be done at any time and in the setting of your choice! Upon completion, it auto- Thanksgiving Checklist: We have learned that couples rarely improve their marriages by trying to change each other. Rather, partners find happiness by focusing on each other's positive attributes. Expressing gratitude and appreciation for these qualities creates a loving, accepting atmosphere between you. Expressing gratitude and appreciation for these qualities creates a loving, accepting atmosphere between you—an optimal environment for building understanding around per-petual issues and finding ways to compromise. For this exercise, take turns selecting three items from the following list that you really like about your spouse. You can learn how to recognize and communicate bids with the following tool from Dr. John Gottman’s book, “What Makes Love Last? It is a list of minor bids and sliding door moments based on Dr. John Gottman’s statistical analyses of couples observed in his research. If you want to plan your Thanksgiving meal in a specific way, we recommend going over this list a day or two ahead of time with your partner so that you can approach your Thanksgiving with some rituals of connection already in mind. Here are some ideas to help you plan. Thanksgiving Checklist Instructions: In this exercise, you may select, from the following list of items, three things you really appreciate about your partner. View all extended ebook content for Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage or r o o r r o r r o Date: 9. o Being attracted to other people or jealousy is not an issue, or o My partner is flirtatious or there may be a recent extra-relationship affair

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